What a messy day!!

I meant to write this post yesterday, but there was just too much going on for me to get the time to do it. Not to mention that I would have been typing with only one hand and you probably would have only gotten a paragraph! You’ll have to excuse me if I start rambling on or if I make no sense at all…the Percocet is kicking in and I’ve already backspaced about 20 times since starting this entry.

After waking up yesterday and finding my arm and eye ten times worse, I called the doctor and was referred to a plastic surgeon who would take over my case. I was hoping to get an early morning appointment, I mean it wasn’t like I was going to be taking a shower anyway so why not look like I went to work out or something?! Oh, vanity, you are such a downfall of mine. Unfortunately I didn’t get an appointment until 2:00, but I guess I should consider myself blessed to have even gotten in at all. Despirate for help, William and I went over to my mom’s house…AKA “the sick ward”. You see, my mom has a stress fracture on her foot that has gotten worse and she wasn’t able to put any weight on it. Between the two of us we made one functioning person- she had two good arms and I had two good legs. Oh we were a sight! Thank goodness my friend Lisa was willing to watch William for us while we went to the doctor. The selfish side of me wanted him to come along, but the mommy in me knew he’d have more fun at Lisa’s. Thank goodness I made the latter decision. She said that he was an angel and didn’t shed a single tear the entire time! He ate a whole grilled cheese for her, didn’t fuss while getting dressed (yes, my child went around all day in his jammies), played with Izzy (their Golden Retriever) and Nathan (their 11 year old), and pretty much spent the entire afternoon outside picking flowers and playing basketball. Needless to say, he was in heaven! Thank you, thank you, thank you, Lisa!

At the appointment, they determined that the mass on my arm was in fact caused by some sort of insect/arachnid bite that had gotten infected. I had to have the spot lanced because even though I am on an antibiotic, I would never get rid of the infection as long as there was dead tissue inside me. So after getting numbed (haha, yeah I guess you could call it that), the doctor made a small incision in my arm and what he saw was a complete shock. He had warned me before he procedure that he was going to have to cut out all the dead tissue, but where he thought the tissue was, there was nothing. The bacteria had eaten a hole the size of a dime in my arm. Boy I am glad that I listen to all my friends who told me to go to the doctor! I don’t care if we have to pay $1000 for that appointment…at least I have an arm!!

After finding the hole, Dr. G scraped around a bit and cleaned out the area. Boy oh boy, was that fun or what?! And to think I was going to go alone! Thank goodness my mama asked if she could go with me. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without her. Before leaving, Dr. G packed my wound and bandaged it up. Thanks to the advice of my dear friend, Hillary, I asked for some pain meds for when the numbing wore off. She had told me that getting something packed would hurt like hell and man was she right! Half way home, I felt like someone was taking a blowtorch to my arm. Second to my kidney stone pain, this was the worst. Ladies, labor pain is a cinch compared to kidney issues and having something lanced/packed sans meds. Asked me again about my pain scale after I have our next baby (which I plan on doing naturally), but as of now, labor is third.

When we picked up Sweet William from Lisa’s, he was playing basketball in the driveway and looked like such a big boy! Go figure, but he fell within 5 minutes of me being there and started bawling. Oh, don’t you just love how boys act around their mamas! I read somewhere though that you judge your child’s behavior on how they are when you’re not around. Thankfully he is an angel when I’m not in sight (well, it sucks for me, but you know what I mean).

With the Percocet my pain is manageable, but I have to alternate it with Ibuprofen so that I don’t let any medicine leave my system. I go back to Dr. G this afternoon for him to check my wound and to possibly unpack it. Here are my prayer requests:

-That my wound is healed enough for him to take all the packing out (I just don’t think I have the stomach for removing it myself…which is what I’ll have to do if it’s not ready today)

-Healing for my eye on its own…I really don’t want to have to get it drained.

-A negative test for MRSA…this is probably the most important for several reasons. If I have MRSA, there are two possible medicines for me to take. However, I am allergic to one and the other would require me weaning William. I am not ok with having to wean William now and the thought of it makes me want to cry.

Thank you so much for all your support and prayers. I’m off to put some dry heat on my eye and to take a nap while William does. Have a great day and I’ll post after my appointment if I can.

-Erin

Is that a twinkle in your eye? Nope, it's a stye!

OK, so here's the deal: I went to the doctor today because I've had what seems to be a spider bite on my left arm for the past 4 days. On top of that I've developed a lovely (ahem) stye on my left eye. Needless to say, I feel like God's giving me a HUGEEEE sign to slow down and stop worrying about everything. I am such a nervous wreck that I've gotten a stye for goodness sake! I've worn contacts for 13 years and make-up for almost as long, but I've never, ever gotten a stinkin' stye.

I've decided to stay home tomorrow (you're welcome, parents) for my sake as well as the kiddos in my class. I am on an antibiotic for the arm thing (which the doctor thinks is a poisonous spider bite) and antibiotic eye drops for the unsightly, unwelcome growth thingy. I go back to the doctor Friday to get the extremely painful thing on my arm rechecked. If it has not gone down, or has gotten bigger, I will have to have it lanced. I'm not exactly sure what this entails and to tell you the truth, I'm not exactly sure I want to know. Ahhhh...Ignorance is bliss.

I'm doing better with the worry thing, friends, so thank you for all your prayers. I am so embarrassed about yesterday's post. I was such an emotional wreck, and desperate for your prayers. I have two prayer concerns for today, if you don't mind:

-I am not allowed to take an antibiotic that covers MRSA because I am breastfeeding. Because MRSA is commonly misdiagnosed for spider bites, (I am not worried) I am concerned that I may develop this infection. If so, I am afraid that I will have to stop nursing Sweet Boy. I loveeee nursing William and don't plan on stopping for at least 4 more months...maybe longer.

-Please also pray for my new business venture, friends. I really feel that God has led me to do this in order to spend more time with my family. Therefore, I am proud to announce that I am the newest consultant for PURSEnally Yours. This company is HOT, HOT, HOT! They are relatively new (3 years young) and growing rapidly. To find out more about the company and how you can host a party, feel free to email me at Hingleytrio@gmail.com (a PURSEnally Yours e-mail will soon be posted) or visit their website www.pursenallyyoursonline.com

Thank you for keeping me and my family close to your heart. I'll post again when I have two good eyes!

-Erin

p.s. Still praying for Sweet Stellan...are you?? Of course you are...that's why he's doing so well!!

Down came the rain

Dear Friends, I can barely see the screen from all the tears in my eyes. I am so pathetic today that it's not even funny. I know you're wondering what's wrong...possibly thinking that something bad happened or that maybe someone is sick/injured. Thankfully we are all fine. Well, if you can call the depressed state that I'm in fine, then I guess that's what we are.

I don't understand what's wrong with me, but I'm scared. I'm so confused as to why I'm on such an emotional rollercoaster right now. I mean, my son's a year old! Enough with the postpartum depression already!

I know that I forgot to take my Zoloft on Saturday, thus I was EXTREMELY dizzy and irritable yesterday. I remembered my medicine yesterday and today so why all the drama??

After work William and I hurried home to crawl back into bed for a rainy day nap. I've been in my PJ's since 2:00. Thinking of how pathetic this act is makes me feel guilty for not playing with my son, instead I nursed him to sleep. Feeling guilty makes me sad, being sad makes me cry, and crying makes my eyes/head/sinuses hurt. See the downward spiral?

I'm sure that the endless pile of "to-do's" around our home only adds to my stress level. There are thank-you cards to write, floors to vacuum and mop, a bathroom to clean, laundry to put away, Easter decorations that need to be labeled and stored, curtains that need to be re-hung (they were taken down two weeks ago for replacement windows), closets that need organized, dishes that need to be washed, and a little boy that needs a mommy that has enough energy to play with him and take care of the household work. I am overwhelmed. The sad part is that I realize everyone has the same chores to do, but somehow they get them done. What's wrong with me that makes me unable to de-clutter the pile of papers/decorations/pictures/Easter candy off of William's high-chair. Don't worry, William is getting fed...I'm not that bad off! He eats at a booster at the table. I now use the highchair as an extra surface for me to use as my overflow pile.

I didn't even make supper tonight. Sean warmed up a frozen dinner and I scrambled William an egg and he had that along with some fresh fruit and cereal. I love to cook...normally. Again, what kept me from making dinner? Maybe it's the overwhelming fact that summer is approaching and I have no clue as to what I will be doing. No clue as to how we'll make it. No clue how we're going to pay our car loans this month...let alone have enough to put into savings. If only our insurance would actually pay something, maybe then we wouldn't be paying off our beautiful son's birth for 5 agonizing years! I also have no clue how we expect to sell one of our vehicles in this economy. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you about that. We've decided to put up both of our cars for sale and sell whichever one gets a bite first (Please be Sean's, please be Sean's). Hopefully this will help our financial situation and you won't hear me complain (as much). I am driving myself crazy over all the unknowns that we have in our lives.

Please, friends, please pray for me. I covet your love and prayers right now. I am yearning to be the wife and mother that God wants me to be. I am so desperate be rid of this relentless depression and to be "normal" again. If you have any suggestions as to what may help me, please feel free to leave a comment. I feel like I am having such a pity party over here, but I definitely needed to get all my emotions out. Thank you for listening, errr reading. Hopefully tomorrow I'll have a more positive, up-beat post for you.

-Erin

p.s. Don't think I've forgotten about Sweet Stellan. I have been praying for him and his family relentlessly all day. Please join me in prayer while he undergoes his heart surgery tomorrow. Live, Stellan, Live!!

Trying to cast my anxiety...

I knew all of this, but it's just reassuring to see it again...especially when I am having "one of those days".

I am anxious, friends. I am also worried. I am trying so hard to hand God my fears about our finances this summer, but I am struggling.

I want to be stronger.

I want to be more faithful.

I want to be whole.

I am desperate for a sign. I wish that it was as simple as God plastering a big billboard or neon sign above His answer for me. If His plan is for me to find a job this summer, then I wish that there was a big bright arrow above the business. If I am supposed to stay home with William, then where is my big fat check in the mail?! Oh, if only it were that easy! Where's the Publishers Clearing House when you need them?? Maybe God is giving me a sign but I am just too blind to see it. That is so frustrating.

Sean has a test on April 30th that will give him a raise (we don't know how much) if he passes. He has been studying for this test for a year and feels prepared, but you know me, I am worried! Please pray for him to do his best and to pass. While you're at it, could you please add me to your list?? You know the request- for peace, provision, and God's grace.

Thank you for your love and support,
Erin


Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
1 Peter 5:7 (New International Version)

Livin' like a rockstar...

Today was such an exciting day! Sean and I were fortunate enough to go to a meet and greet/mini concert with the Plain White T's. While there we had a yummy lunch, verrry enjoyable concert, signing and photo session. I also won two tickets to the show that night and a CD. I had my joint purse party with Hillary so Sean and my dad went to the concert (I'm guessing they had fun because it's 12:30 and they're still out...). Hope you enjoy a peek at our waaaay out of the dorm day:

William's Onesie

Me with all my goodies!

Seany was supposed to be in this group shot, but he got cut out. Poor, Sean.

Getting William's onesie signed- I think it was the first they've autographed!

Singing "1...2...3...4"

Hope you all had a great day too! I'm off to nurse Sweet Boy and then it's straight to bed! Sleep tight!

-Erin

Good news...

I just wanted to let you all know that I got a call from William's doctor this morning letting me know that his lead levels are normal. I was worried that they would come back high since our apartment was built in the 20's. Praise God for keeping Sweet Boy healthy!! Thanks for all your prayers and love towards our family.

-Erin

A little bit of this...a little bit of that...

Hello, friends! This post is a disheveled recap of the past few days so please bear with me...we have been busy bees! This week I have been on Spring Break and enjoying every moment of it. William and I have slept in, spent precious moments together, and shared many, many hugs. Sweet Boy has been running a low-grade fever because he's cutting his eye teeth (and apparently these are the most difficult to cut) and I have been doing my best to make him comfortable. We've been snuggling in bed and nursing A LOT! I just have to take a moment to brag on my boys. They were so good to me yesterday. Sean came home from work to make me lunch and then made dinner as well! Yes, this is the same Sean who's specialty is grilled cheese and soup! What an awesome Birthday gift...a break from being mama slave. Here are some pictures of our lives since last Thursday:

William's latest "masterpiece"

Poor William had a fever when we colored eggs and felt awful :-(

Mommy, Daddy, and Grampy made William's eggs for him while he was cuddled by Gram

William's goodies from the Easter Bunny!

All ready to go to church

Easter egg hunt at Mamaw and Papaw's

Go, William, Go!!!

Hingley family Easter picture

William loves trips to Busch Gardens!

...and so does Alie!

Can you believe it was 90 degrees on Good Friday?? What a fun Sesame Place!

Splish Splash!!

William wants to work at the new 5 Guys too!!

Visiting Uncle Cole at 5 Guys Grand Opening

I will definitely have more to post tomorrow night...Sean and I are going to a private concert/meet and greet with the Plain White Tees at lunch! They'll be plenty of pictures to share...

Nighty night,

Erin